MAN: ♪ Martha was an average dog ♪ ♪ She went... and... and... ♪ (barking, growls) ♪ When she ate some alphabet soup ♪ ♪ Then what happened was bizarre... ♪ On the way to Martha's stomach, the letters lost their way.

They traveled to her brain, and now... ♪ She's got a lot to say ♪ ♪ Now she speaks... ♪ How now, brown cow?

♪ Martha speaks ♪ ♪ Yeah, she speaks and speaks and speaks ♪ ♪ And speaks and speaks... ♪ What's a caboose?

When are we eating again?

♪ Martha speaks... ♪ Hey, Joe, what do you know?

My name's not Joe.

♪ She's not always right, but still that Martha speaks... ♪ Hi, there.

♪ She's got the voice, she's ready to shout ♪ ♪ Martha will tell you what it's all about ♪ ♪ Sometimes wrong, but seldom in doubt ♪ ♪ Martha will tell you what it's all about ♪ ♪ That dog's unique... ♪ Testing, one, two.

♪ Hear her speak ♪ ♪ Martha speaks and speaks and speaks and speaks and... ♪ ♪ Communicates, enumerates, elucidates, exaggerates ♪ ♪ Indicates and explicates ♪ ♪ Bloviates and overstates and... ♪ (panting) ♪ Hyperventilates.

♪ ♪ Martha-- to reiterate-- Martha speaks.

♪ (dogs barking) (clock chimes three times) 3:00!

School's out!

(Skits whining) Oh relax, Skits, she's just late.

Like yesterday.

(Skits whining) And the day before that, yes.

(sighs) (door opens) That was great finding that book about Carnival, Susan.

But now I'm the one who has to read it.

See, Skits, I told you!

HELEN: I sympathize, but... Oh, hi, Martha, hi, Skits.

Okay, so then, Susan, you'll do the part about Brazilian industry, and TD can do the cultural stuff, but it has to be comprehensive.

TD: Like I even know what that word means.

You ready to play yet?

In a minute, Martha.

How about now?

In a minute.

Has it been a minute yet?

Martha... Now?

HELEN: Martha!

You're standing in Sao Paulo!

Get off!

Shoo, shoo, shoo!

HELEN: Oh, I'm going to have to redo all of this.

Fire hydrant, park, dumpster tour... (sighs) None of that's any fun without... (brakes squealing) Whoa!

(annoyed squawk) Oh, my.

Are you okay?

(angry chatter) I didn't quite catch that.

(angry chatter) Sorry.

I don't speak monkey.

(groaning) Hey, I know you!

You're that Professor Monkey, aren't you?

(dizzy groan) (panicked squawk) Huh?

(frantic chatter) Run?

(squawks loudly) Whoever is after you, Professor, you're safe now.

They'll never find you under here.

(growling) Bob!

(sighs) Are we finished now, Professor?

(excited squawking) Wait a minute.

I know you!

Don't you two work together?

I'm Beppo.

We write the Monkey-Do-So-You-Can-Too books.

The professor was just taking a little break.

I'm confused.

He was acting like you were a bad guy.

I'm sure he was.

The professor is not only a genius at inventing things, he's also a genius at inventing stories.

(embarrassed chuckle) Well, I guess I should let you two get back to work, then.

(squawking) Well, how about that?

What?

He wants to know if you'd like to join us for lunch.

I've been waiting all my life for someone to ask me that.

Wow.

So all of these are models for the book you're working on?

Yes, How to Make a Car from Popsicle Sticks.

The research is complete.

It's just the writing we have to finish.

But there's so much pressure when we have deadlines.

The professor will do anything to relieve it.

Relieve?

What's that?

(chattering) Oh, uh... (more chattering) To relieve means get rid of whatever is bothering you.

Oh, like getting relief from pressure by going for a drive in a popsicle-stick car?

Mm-hmm.

Thank you.

(Martha gobbling) Delicious.

MARTHA: You know, I wish Helen could get some relief.

She's been working on a report for school all week.

I don't think it's ever going to end.

(curious chatter) Huh?

"Who's Helen?"

Oh, Helen's the person I live with.

Usually I bring her all sorts of relief.

But not anymore, I guess.

Hey, I know what could help you relax, Professor.

A dog of your own.

(chatters excitedly) Oh, no.

Not me.

I already have a family.

But I could help you find a pet of your own, Professor.

I know just about every stray in Wagstaff City.

So then Professor Monkey got really excited, and he asked me if I could show him some dogs.

And I said I'd ask you first, because I didn't know if you were going to be free.

That's nice.

(disappointed whine) The animal shelter's the best place to start.

Any of these dogs would be more than happy to come home with you.

Hey, Millie.

Jumpy.

Drooley.

So, which one do you... (chattering) Oh, I get it.

A break.

He's not just a nice guy, he's also a genius.

(barks) Oh, a genius is someone who's really, really, really smart.

Professor Monkey is such a genius, he can make a car out of popsicle sticks.

(barks) Professor, this is Jake.

He's a Rottweiler/Dachshund mix.

Uh, break?

Oh, yeah.

Uh, it's kittens.

Kittens grow into cats, so, you know, it's no wonder they're giving them away.

Break?

(squawks) Yeesh, kittens.

You really are a genius.

(laughing) Gin.

(squawks in frustration) Hey!

My sausages!

Helen.

Wait'll I tell you what happened today.

(snoring) So I was thinking I might spend all day at Professor Monkey's.

That sounds like... Corned beef?

That's a weird thing to export.

Yeah, that does sound weird.

(panting) (sighs) Well, I just wanted to tell you.

I might be gone a long time.

All day, maybe.

Unless you want me here.

Mm-hmm.

Okay.

Well, I guess I'm leaving now.

So... bye.

(doorbell rings) Hi, Professor.

(device beeps) I have a surprise.

You invented a way to talk?

Yes.

From tape and common kitchen utensils.

Now come look.

(squawking) He's been working on these all night.

You mean besides inventing a talking machine?

Well, he is a genius.

How to turn lawn furni... (static sounds) (repeating): Furni... How to furnish... Genius-ish.

A flying couch?

Don't take too long.

We need to get ready for the... book tour.

Wow!

(laughing) (barking) This looks like a great place to unwind.

No, I don't mean unwind that way, like you unwind a ball of string or something.

Unwind also means to relax or just rest awhile.

You know, like...

Unwind.

You know, when Helen and I want to unwind, we just relax on the couch and listen to music.

If she isn't too busy.

(laughing) (clock chimes three times) Oh no, it's 3:00.

(confused chattering) Helen's getting out of school now.

We have to go back.

(squawks in dismay) Oh...

Sorry about that.

(horn honking) Okay, Professor.

Enough fun.

(anxious chattering) I sympathize, but it's time to hit the road.

You're leaving?

Where are you going?

The professor and I are touring 19 cities to advertise his last book, which was just published.

It will be fun, fun, fun.

Oh, so I guess I won't be seeing you for a while.

(squawking) You want me to go with you?

Fun.

All the time.

Fun.

But Helen... (blows a raspberry) Hey, come on.

She's my friend.

She's just busy with her reports and her other friends and stuff.

Choose.

Now, Professor Monkey, that's not...

Please?

Look, Professor, I know if I went off with you in that car, I'd have a lot of fun being your pet.

More fun than at home, even, maybe.

But we're from two different worlds.

I'm a talking dog and you're a monkey who's a professor of making craft items out of everyday household objects.

And sooner or later-- maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but on Thursday probably-- I know I'm going to realize something.

Monkeys should not have pets?

No.

Listen to me: monkeys should have pets.

All monkeys should have pets.

No, what I'm saying is something else.

It's that all the fun in the world wouldn't make up for the hurt it would cause someone I care about.

And even though she's busy right now, Helen would be hurt.

I can't come with you.

I'm sorry.

Here you go.

Thanks.

Look, Professor, I sympathize, but I'm sure you'll find a pet of your own someday.

I will cherish always being friends with you.

I will, too.

Wait, what?

You will share what?

(squawking) Cherish.

Will cherish always.

Cherish always.

Cherish always.

Huh?

Cherish means you really, really like something.

Right?

(squawks in agreement) Oh-- well, I will cherish being friends, too, Professor.

(happy chatter) HELEN: Martha.

There you are.

You weren't at school.

I was getting worried.

Oh, I got... delayed.

I wanted to tell you that I'm sorry I ignored you this morning.

I was nervous about my report.

But guess what?

What?

It's finished.

Really?

So who wants to fetch?

I do!

Me!

Go get it.

I'm glad you're home.

I'm glad you're home, too.

Stick, stick, stick!

(laughing) Fetch, yeah!

Right here, Martha.

So, you want to go outside and throw a stick around or something?

Martha... my ankle?

Right.

Why don't you lick it?

That's what I always do when my paw hurts.

I can't lick my ankle.

Want me to lick it?

You're sweet but... CAROLINA: Hey, lazybones.

what are you doing on the couch?

I sprained my ankle in gym class.

Oh, I can totally empathize.

I once sprained my ankle running to the mall.

My foot looked like an eggplant for a week but I got the cutest shorts for half off.

(sniffing) What's in there?

Tamales.

For humans.

Figures.

My dad made them for our sleepover before he took off.

Hey, did you see this note?

What's it say?

"Remember to take Martha to the vet."

Oh, that's trash.

Oh, I completely forgot.

Martha has to go in for her shots.

Don't be a hero, Helen.

The vet can wait until you get better.

Longer, even.

Actually, forever.

You shouldn't put pressure on that ankle, Helen.

Trust me.

Listen to Carolina.

She knows what she's talking about.

I'll take Martha to the vet.

Don't listen to her.

She doesn't know what she's talking about.

Thanks, Carolina.

No hay problema.

Come on, Martha, I've got the leash.

Leash?

Martha, come here.

I need you on the leash.

Why?

So you don't run off.

Me?

Squirrel!

Martha!

(barking) Martha!

Come here, right now!

Hey!

Martha!

Bologna.

Whoa, mud.

(grossed out) Martha!

(cheering and laughing) Got you.

Aw...

It's a good thing you didn't...

Shoes!

Mud!

Shoes!

Carolina?

Mud shoes.

VET: This shouldn't hurt a bit...

There.

All done.

MARTHA: Thanks, doc.

Send us the bill.

Okay, let's hit the road.

Uh-uh-uh.

I was afraid you'd say that.

It's kind of tough being a dog sometimes.

I empathize.

No, wait, I sympathize.

I always get those two mixed up.

Really?

Wh-wh-what's the difference?

Empathy means you know exactly what the other person feels because you've gone through the exact same thing yourself.

For instance, I've had mud on my shoes, so I can empathize with what Carolina is going through.

Sympathy is something else?

Yeah.

It's sort of the same feeling-- you feel sorry for what someone else is going through-- but with sympathy, you haven't had the same thing happen to you.

Sympathy, empathy.

Sort of the same, but slightly different.

That is really fascinating.

Well, thanks, doc.

Anytime, Martha.

Ready?

Let's go.

Hurry.

I'll meet you outside.

We've got to... Uh-oh.

Almost forgot one thing.

Okay, Doc, I'm ready.

I already gave it to you.

You did?

Oh.

Hey, that wasn't so bad.

Martha, come on, we have to get home.

It's going to rain.

I have to do some business.

You're not doing anything, you're just sniffing.

Don't pressure me.

Empathize a little.

(sniffing) I don't know how you can sniff hydrants and trees.

Dogs have the most repellent mannerisms.

I thought mannerisms were good.

Like saying "please" and "thank you."

That's manners.

Mannerisms are things you do a lot.

Like if you wave your hands when you talk, or if you bite your fingernails when you're nervous.

Those are manerismos, mannerisms.

Hm.

That's three words I've learned just on this one little trip to the vet's.

Ooh, Rinty was here.

Martha!

It's going to rain.

Hurry up.

I told you, I have important business.

All you have is disgusting dog business.

Eating out of trash, rolling in mud, sniffing everything.

That's important.

Not to me.

So?

So come on.

Maybe you should try to have a little sympathy.

Maybe you should try walking on a leash.

Maybe you should see what it's like to be a dog.

(thunder) Oh, no.

I told you.

Made it.

Martha!

Sorry.

I'm wet.

I knew this was going to... (sneezes) to... (sneezes) Ay, pobrecita, let's get you into some dry clothes and in a warm bed.

Hey, I'm wet and cold too.

Anyone have any sympathy for the dog?

Anybody?

(moans) (sneezes) (moans) (sneezes) (Helen keeps moaning, Carolina keeps sneezing) It's going to be a long night.

(thunder) CAROLINA: Wow, I feel so much better.

What a relief.

Um, hello?

Where did you come from?

Martha, where did that dog come from?

CAROLINA: Huh?

Oh no!

I'm a dog.

(barking) Martha, you better get that collie out of here before Carolina sees it.

You know she's not crazy about dogs.

(barks) She says she is Carolina.

As if.

(barks) What did she say?

She says she just woke up and suddenly she was a dog.

Okay... (sniffing) Let me ask you a question.

Dogs should be on leashes: true or false?

(barks) True?

You are Carolina.

(gasps) Say, "Ah."

Ugh, you have bad breath.

But that's characteristic of dogs.

(barks) This dog has all the mannerisms and characteristics of a dog.

Characteristics?

Characteristics are the things that are special about how you look or how you act.

Oh, so when you say she has the characteristics of a dog, you mean... She's furry, has four paws, a tail, and barks.

(barks) Carolina says she doesn't want to have any of the characteristics of a dog.

She wants us to switch her back into a human.

(barking) As soon as possible.

Don't worry, Carolina.

We'll get you back to normal.

Excuse me?

Being a dog isn't normal?

Okay, okay.

You're not really a dog.

Lassie.

(growls) TRUMAN: Listen, if we can figure out how Carolina became a dog in the first place, maybe we can reverse it.

Hey, I got it!

Maybe she was bitten by some weird half-dog, half-kid under a full moon?

You're not saying... Carolina's... a weredog.

Dun-dun-dun!

Hmm.

What are the characteristics of a weredog?

I don't know.

Like werewolves, I guess.

Only doggier.

Good theory, but there wasn't a full moon last night.

Oh, right.

Anyone else have any ideas?

Ooh, me.

I do.

(sighs) Anyone else have any ideas?

Maybe Carolina... switched places with a dog.

You mean... She's a dog, but at the exact same time, somewhere out there, there's a dog living in Carolina's body.

Uh, don't worry, Carolina, I'm sure a dog didn't switch places with you.

At least I hope not.

Hmm... Uh-huh.

It's just what I thought.

I'm afraid there's no easy way to say this.

What?

Carolina... has fleas.

Dun-dun-dun.

(whining) I can empathize.

Even the best of us get fleas sometimes.

But, uh, I'll just stand way over here, okay?

(sniffs, barks) (sniffs) You're right.

I smell it too.

Come on!

Ooh, a hamburger.

Dig in.

(barks) Gross?

You're a dog now.

You should learn to cherish these moments when it's just you and the trash.

(chirping) Carolina, chasing squirrels is what dogs do.

They're just... what you called them yesterday.

Mannerisms, right?

We can't help ourselves.

You're a dog now, Carolina.

Trust your instincts.

(Helen gasps) Martha, you know you're not supposed to go through the trash.

Carolina.

Bad girl.

I can't believe I'm talking to my cousin like this.

(barks) What did she say?

She said she's starting to see things from a dog's point of view.

You mean you're seeing things from down here?

A point of view means the way you understand things.

When Carolina says she can see things from your point of view, she means she understands them the way you do.

She really understands a dog's point of view.

Carolina!

HELEN: Heel, girl!

TRUMAN: Come back!

(barking) CAROLINA: Hey, that's my papi.

(barking) Ay, ay, ay!

Perro loco!

Shoo.

Go away, dog.

Vete!

Shoo, shoo.

Papi, it's me, Carolina!

ALL: Carolina!

Here, girl!

(whistling) It's Tío Jorge.

Come on.

I guess we'd better tell him what happened.

But how could it happen?

Well, it's hard to say.

She was either bitten by a weredog, or it could just be that she's... just really lucky.

I don't care if Carolina is a dog.

Es mi hija, and I love her.

We must find her.

Come on!

Carolina!

Carolina.

Carolina!

¿Dónde estás?

She's a collie, no tags, and... No tags!

I know where she is.

So you see, that collie isn't a real dog... she's a person.

I totally sympathize, but if I let every dog that thought it was a human out of the shelter, this place would be empty.

Well, what if I adopt her and I take her home with me?

That's against section six, rule 19 of the Dog Shelter code.

"A dog cannot adopt another dog... even if that dog can speak."

You just made up that part about speaking, didn't you?

Well, uh... (door opens) There she is!

Ah mi hijita!

That dog is my daughter.

Release her immediately.

Well, she does have your eyes.

Carolina, even though you're a dog, I still cherish you, mi hija.

To dig up some more fun words and games, visit pbskids.org or check out your local library for the "Martha Speaks" books.

Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org